For this assignment, I interviewed my mom, my best friend's mom, and my cousin. When I interviewed my mom, she went into a whole lot of detail that I feel are not necessary for online text. Most of her answers were brought out with feelings of joy and happiness. However, at some points there were hinted feelings of negativity like when remembering being locked in a private room following the information that her baby might be in stress. She also said that one of the hardest parts was the actual pushing. Another negative aspect was when my large head caused a hematoma. I guess it says something about me doesn't it. Although there were some minor negativities, her overall answers were similar to "incredulous, ecstatic and just overall jubilant at every moment." From this interview, my main reaction is that no matter how painful or negative the one moment might be, the entire experience is completely worth it. I think that the main reaction when first presented with one's own newborn is complete love and adoration.

My second interviewee was my best friend's mom who had two very different experiences with her two children. Her first child was when she was still in college and it was unexpected. She got kicked out and relied on her best friend's support throughout the pregnancy. She went into labor on a Thursday evening and didn't actually give birth until Sunday. She used doctors and went to a hospital but felt held down and trapped when the doctors wouldn't let her go anywhere or even walk around. She actually punched a nurse in the face. Another difficulty was that the umbilical cord got wrapped around her son's neck so they had to use forceps to push him back in order to unwrap it. However, all of these negativities were forgotten for the moment when she held her son for the first time and experienced great joy. Her second birth experience was a bit less stressful. With midwives and more family around her, she was able to have an easier time giving birth. Her daughter actually came out so fast that she didn't have time to make the expected preparations. I think that out of all of this, it shows that pregnancies aren't always happy and cuddly but almost always result in a beautiful baby that just brings back all of that happiness.

My third interviewee was my cousin who had to deal with being pregnant at 16, keeping a job, and staying at school. She told me that she wouldn't have been able to do it without the support of her parents. Another struggle was having to deal with judgments from the people around her such as teachers and fellow students. But she didn't let them get her down. She said that throughout the pregnancy, she was very emotional and sensitive; she often cried. She also said that when remembering the actual experience, all it was was PAIN. However, similar to my other interviews, her overpowering reaction to both kids was love at first sight. I think that even in the worst situations, having even one or two people there to help can make the whole experience worth it. Another thing is that if you don't let other people's thoughts bring you down, it can make the whole birth worthwhile.

From listening to these women describe their experiences, I want to look further into how doctors deal with the pregnancies that don't go according to plan. What are the procedures for dealing with problems with the baby or mother during labor and how do they compare to how midwives deal with them?

Homework #35: Other People's thoughts on Birth

When asking about perspectives on birth, I found one thing to be a major pattern: pain. When asked, most of my peers' first bubble was pain. If most of society sees birth as something miraculous and wonderful, as seen through pop-culture and personal inquiry, then why is it that pain is the first thing that comes to mind? I asked my friend, Emily, if she would want a natural or anesthetized birth and she immediately responded with "give me an epidural, girl!" When asked why, she said the she just wouldn't be able to handle the pain.

Another pattern I found to be common when asked about fatherly roles was protection. A lot of my peers mentioned protection and deep care in their answers. I asked why and one of them responded with "because she's vulnerable." This made me wonder why we think that in a woman's strongest state and dealing with probably the hardest time of her life, she needs "protection." And just what do we expect when we say protection? A watchdog? Or just someone to keep us out of harm's way?

Another expectation from a lot of my peers was the "servant" aspect. When asked, a lot of them said the father should do everything for the mother and wait on her hand-and-foot. I think this comes from the idea that pregnant women aren't supposed to be under any stress and it's up to the father to keep that stress level down. When asked, Emily said, "just get her pickles at 3:00am and ice cream. Sympathize, don't criticize." I found some humor in that last line. According to popular culture and media, the men are expected to spend most of the third trimester doing everything for the mother. It's a wonder they're not tearing their hair out by the time the baby is actually born (although some might be close).

Homework #34: Initial Thoughts on Birth

My first reaction to the concept of birth was a whole bunch of thoughts based on the scientific and emotional aspects of birth. However, when I stepped back and looked at them all on a piece of paper, they were all over the place and had no connections to each other. Diving into the evidence behind these reactions, I realized that most of my knowledge of the birthing process and birth itself comes from the various "doctor" shows I am currently watching such as Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice. This gave me a new question as to whether or not they truly recreated the actual process of giving birth. When I asked my mom, she said that when they show someone in labor, be it Hollywood movies or TV shows, the actual scene doesn't last any more than five minutes. However, she said that in reality, labor can last as long as 48 hours, sometimes more. Lucky for her, my brother and I didn't take that long. I believe that TV and Hollywood shorten the length of birth because they could never have a scene that long and they only have enough time to show five minutes. However, a new question this develops is why do they romanticize the concept of giving birth by showing the baby as already clean and glowing when in actuality, babies are covered in blood and other fluids with the umbilical cord still attached? I know this both from my mother and a scarring video from 6th grade. From what my mother has told me, birth is a long and painful process that ends with more happiness and love than one can imagine (these are her feelings). I think in some cases the latter is not always true but again, this knowledge is only from what I've seen on TV. I have yet to experience such feelings but I hope I do at some point in my life.

Questions I have:

Why is it that if the maternal bond is so strong between a mother and her baby, she can still give her child up for adoption afterwards?

What is the dominantly expected role of the husband to play during a woman's pregnancy and labor?

Why is is so important to take prenatal vitamins when pregnant?

Why are women so hormonal from pregnancies?