When asking about perspectives on birth, I found one thing to be a major pattern: pain. When asked, most of my peers' first bubble was pain. If most of society sees birth as something miraculous and wonderful, as seen through pop-culture and personal inquiry, then why is it that pain is the first thing that comes to mind? I asked my friend, Emily, if she would want a natural or anesthetized birth and she immediately responded with "give me an epidural, girl!" When asked why, she said the she just wouldn't be able to handle the pain.
Another pattern I found to be common when asked about fatherly roles was protection. A lot of my peers mentioned protection and deep care in their answers. I asked why and one of them responded with "because she's vulnerable." This made me wonder why we think that in a woman's strongest state and dealing with probably the hardest time of her life, she needs "protection." And just what do we expect when we say protection? A watchdog? Or just someone to keep us out of harm's way?
Another expectation from a lot of my peers was the "servant" aspect. When asked, a lot of them said the father should do everything for the mother and wait on her hand-and-foot. I think this comes from the idea that pregnant women aren't supposed to be under any stress and it's up to the father to keep that stress level down. When asked, Emily said, "just get her pickles at 3:00am and ice cream. Sympathize, don't criticize." I found some humor in that last line. According to popular culture and media, the men are expected to spend most of the third trimester doing everything for the mother. It's a wonder they're not tearing their hair out by the time the baby is actually born (although some might be close).
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